Santa Had a Bad Day

Did you ever wonder where the tradition of placing an angel on top of a Christmas tree came from.  Here is one theory that appears plausable to me.

Santa had a bad day
Four of his elves got sick
The trainee elves did not produce
The toys quite as quick
Santa felt the pressure
Down in his big round belly
His Christmas plans were turning out
Like undeveloped jelly

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa
Her mom would soon come visit
His stress was building daily
"this isn't my year, is it?"
He went to harness reindeer
And found that three were preggers
Two others had just jumped the fence
Where were those lousy beggars?

When he began to load the sleigh
One of the floorboards cracked
The toy bag fell to the ground
No longer were they stacked
Frustrated poor old Santa
Went for a cup of cider
And maybe just a shot of rum
With the pressure getting tighter

But the cupboard, it was empty
The elves had drunk it all
And hidden all his liquor
Those elves sure had some gall
Frustration ever growing
He dropped the cider jug
And scattered glass upon the floor
And even on the rug

He went to get his trusty broom
But the mice ate all the straw
Not a thing was going right
Then he looked up and saw
An angel standing at his door
He heard the doorbell ring
He yanked that big door open
And heard the angel sing

"Merry Christmas to you Santa
Isn't this a lovely day
I pray this day is going right
For you in every way
I've brought a little Christmas tree
And I, myself, did pick it
It's yours because you're Santa Claus
Where would you like to stick it?"


Thus began the custom
And why today you see
A pretty little angel
On top the Christmas tree

Mdailey   12/10/08

Please make this a part of your Christmas reading this year.

SANTA ?

I wrote a little Christmas poem on the way to work last year. I had to keep repeating lines to myself as traffic was moving and I could not write and drive at the same time. I didn’t want to forget the words and for once, I was hoping for a red light. I finally got behind a school bus with flashing red lights and could jot down most of the lines. Here it is – my Christmas poem for all of you.  Go ahead and sign in as a follower so I know who is reading these.   Thanks    Mike

SANTA?

It’s my early morning habit to walk down my long drive
To get my morning paper while the world’s still not alive
But the early morning silence was shattered by the sound
Of leaves as they were scattered along the frozen ground.
Squinting through the darkness I thought I saw some moves
Reflecting off the moonlight was that antlers; were those hooves?
I know it’s late December and with Christmas almost here
Could that be dear old Santa and his pack of eight reindeer?
I never saw a red sleigh or spied a fat old elf
But I didn’t look that closely, I’d rather fool myself
And just go on believing that Santa’s just a myth
And its parents not old Santa that brought me Christmas gifts
But there’s a still a little boy inside me whose heart just skipped a beat
If it really was old Santa, wouldn’t that be neat!

Mdailey     12/23/08

Ocean Ridge Singers

I joined a singing group down here in NC (I was volunteered by my loving wife without my knowledge) and we had our winter performance last week and weekend.  I tried to capture the moment(s) in rhyme.  Let me know what you think.

The afterglow of the show still lingers
From when I sang with the Ocean Ridge singers
With altos and tenors, base and soporano
Alice conducting and Ruth on piano
We met every week for an hour long practice
But that Hallelu Chorus left my throat like a cactus
On the night of the shows we just crossed our fingers
That we’d hit all the notes for the ballads and swingers
Now the “12 Days of Christmas” was fun for us all
When everyone stood up and danced in the hall
Joanne’s touching solo on being a tree
Put a lump in the throat of that wee boy in me
And when Maggi Edwards got up there to sing
Her “Breath of Heaven” pulled on my heart string
“What Child is This?” – “O Holy Night”
“Ring the Bells” – they were pure delight
And while “Santa Baby” just made me chuckle
“Swinging with Santa” was always white-knuckle
I cherished the chance to sing with the octet
But that first night fiasco I just can’t forget

I’d like to go on naming each singer and song
But the rhymes are not there or the poem grows too long
As I said at the start, the afterglow lingers
I can’t wait for the spring and the Ocean Ridge Singers

Mdailey       12/14/09

My Girlfriend

I wrote this a couple of years ago - no hidden meaning - I just liked the way the words sounded together.  Of course every guy (and every girl) wants a girlfriend/boyfriend that is a little naughty even if it means they get nothing for Christmas.
My girlfriend got nothing for Christmas
While young she was nothing but bad
Now that we’re dating each other
Her bad is the best that I’ve had

She knew that old Santa was watching
Tracking to see who’s bad and who’s good
She knew how to be good for goodness
She knew how but she never would


We grew up not far from each other
My parents said she’s not our kind
You wouldn’t believe all the stories
I did then but now I don’t mind

We met then one night at a party
She said I looked lonely and sad
She showed me a way we could change that
My girlfriend is nothing but bad


My girlfriend got nothing for Christmas
While young she was nothing but bad
Now that we’re dating each other
Her bad is the best that I’ve had

Mdailey 

Christmas in Your Pocket

OK - it is time for a few Christmas themed poems.  A little on the light-hearted side.
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season" Saint Peter said,” You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."


My version - - -

St. Peter told the gentlemen "to pass the Pearly Gate
Show me something that's like Christmas - go on, I'll simply wait"
The first man fumbled through his pockets and came out with a BIC
"The lighter's like a candle" --- "OK - that does the trick"
The second grabbed his car keys and with some mighty shakes
"They're bells just like at Christmas" --- "OK - that's all it takes"
The third man got real nervous - he was feeling kind of ill
Then pulled out a pair of panties and said "These ought to fit the bill"
St. Peter raised an eyebrow - what he heard then brought a grin
"These are Carols" said the third man. St. Peter let him in!
If the moral of the story was "Always Be Prepared -
Keep Christmas in your pocket” - How would you have fared?


The real Moral of the Story - - -

When you run into Saint Peter
The Pearly Gate great greeter
So he doesn’t close the gate and simply lock it
Keep in mind our dear Lord’s glory
And how you’ll tell the story
Of how you always kept some Christmas in your pocket.

Mdailey     12/03/07

A Soldier’s Letter Home

I can’t believe it is that time of year
I haven’t yet gotten that old Christmas Cheer
What with you back at home and me over here
I love you and miss you my dear

And even though I’m near the place of His birth
I hear no “Merry Christmas”; see no Christmas mirth
And Lord knows from here I see no Peace on Earth
I love you and miss you my dear

But we’ve put up a tree – looks like Charlie Brown’s
And we’ve hung on its branches gold-colored spent rounds
And when the wind blows those tinkle bells sound
I love you and miss you my dear

I miss the kids more and more every day
And you know I would be there if there was any way
Tell them I miss them and ask them to pray
I love you and miss you my dear

Now give the kids kisses and say “Daddy loves you”
And I’ll hurry home once my tour here is through
So I can give kisses and hugs to you too
I love you and miss you my dear


Well the Captain is calling, the fighting’s begun
I’ve put on my helmet, my vest; grabbed my gun
Say a prayer for me dear but now I’ve got to run
I love you and miss you my dear

Mdailey 12/06/09

Mammograms

One Doc say’s “Forget it
Mammogram – don’t get it”
One Doc says “Take heed
The mammogram you need”

This split in doctor’s thinking
Got me thinking what is shrinking
Decrease in women lost?
Or insurance profit cost?

Can women skip a year or two
Like some doctors say to do
Or have some sold out their concurrence
To the boys of health insurance


I’d rather ere on the side of life
When it comes down to my wife
I’ll tell the doc – “no disrespect
But I’d rather that you checked”


I don’t know who’s wrong or right
But I know I can sleep at night
Knowing my wife has a plan
To get a yearly mammogram

Mdailey 12/05/09

Remember When

Remember when PJs had feet in their bottoms
You believed in old Santa when you first got em
And remember the time you thought you had caught him
Putting presents out under our tree

I remember back then with my older sister
Who got me to do things – I couldn’t resist her
“I thought I heard Santa” she said in a whisper
Putting presents out under our tree

Well the tree was way down at the end of the hall
So on bellies and elbows we made that long crawl
Thinking we’d finally catch Santa and all
Putting presents out under our tree

The tree had been set up for barely a week
And Christmas and Santa was still a mystic
So careful and quiet we both took a peek
To see who was out there under our tree

We must have just missed him for the presents were there
A train set, some dolls and an overstuffed bear
And Mom and the neighbors were taking great care
Putting presents back under our tree


They must have heard Santa and rushed to the tree
They were bigger and faster than sister and me
It was them and not us that year got to see
Santa putting presents out under our tree


So sister and I, disappointed and all
On bellies and elbows snuck back down the hall
Thinking maybe next year when we wouldn’t be small
We could catch Santa out under our tree


But sister and I didn’t try it again
We grew up and believing in Santa grew thin
But each year at Christmas I think back to when
We almost caught Santa there under our tree

Mdailey 12/05/09

Repeal Day

In terms of holidays, it’s not in the same league as Christmas and New Year’s Day. Still, anyone who enjoys a cold beer ought to raise a glass in honor of Repeal Day. On Dec. 5, 1933, Congress ratified the 21st Amendment to the Constitution, sweeping away Prohibition and quenching the thirst of Americans. Of course, it was not as simple as that. North Carolina did not repeal until 1935, and to this day, the state is still a patchwork of alcohol laws.


On December the 5th, 1933
The constitution was changed to please you and me
Prohibition died with the signed 21st
And Americans quenched a 13 year thirst.
But some states rebelled keeping “No Drinking” alive
North Carolina kept at it till the year ’35.
Now we can all drink till our eyeballs are floating
Just not while we’re driving – not while we’re boating
For if we get caught on a D.W.I
We’ll be hauled into court and asked to tell why
You’ll pay a big fine or in jail you’ll be wiltin’
Unless you are Lindsey or maybe a Hilton
So lets raise a glass to the Congressmen who
Sponsored this bill and pushed it on through
So that all of your friends and all of their kin
Could bathe now that the bathtub is not filled with gin

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

Mdailey 12/05/07

December 5th - Repeal Day

I’m not a drinker, a drunkard, a sot
To drink or abstain to me matters not
But one who imbibes has what I ain’t got
An excuse for the things that they say


So here’s to the boozehound, the guzzler, the lush
The rumdum, the rummy whose speaking is mush
The tippler, the wino with their rosy blush
Drink up for it’s now Repeal Day

Mdailey 12/05/08

December 5th is the day the law on prohibition was overturned. It is celebrated throughout the US as a day to eat, drink, and be merry.